I have moved.

   new blog..new post...http://gidygids.blogspot.com/

   Again after a very very very long time...I write again..i would like to apoligize for my inconsistency..well if anyone even reads this..haha

   anyway.This week is finals week im having 4 exams namely Law11, Sociology, Accounting and Math..the first two subjects do not realy pressure me since i have performed well in both classes, accounting in the other hand is quite problematic, even though im assured of passing(i think so) i am hoping for a hinger mark..Math is most troublsome since i dont even know if i can pass..huhu

  During the past months iv'e gone thru a lot of thinking. Ive been trying to realize things about my life. Finding a bit of meaning n things i do. Wondering if im living a life of purpose. I'm not realy sad or regreting things i have done it's more of wondering if i am doing the right thing, if i am at the right path, if what i am doing what i want. Ive been thinking about my studies, track and field, music my friends and clasmates.Have i lived a life of meaning or have i wasted much of god's blessings.

   theres a funny thought that runs thru my mind everytime i wake up during the late mornings. As i open my eyes sweet silence welcomes me. Its funny but during the nights i which silence sould overshadow noise it seldom does but mornings are heaven. so quite and peacefull..these are the times i usualy listen to music and talk to someone up there.

   i'll right more next time..i have to organize my thoughts..hahaha..

   Just a few days ago news arrived narrating a loss of a great man. Stee Irwin, the great crocodile hunter is no more. As a child i was fashinated at his passion and love for the environment. He has an unquestionable courage facing the worlds deadliest creatures to inspire and creae awareness among us. His love is amazing and always he wanted to share this love with us. I will never forget his australian accent that always had a way of simplyfing the great wonders of nature. He died happy, doing what he loved...It is a great loss and a chalenge to us as well..to continue his mission, to see his life as an example, to make sure his life's work will not be in vain..One of the worlds greates environmentalist is gone, a great defender of mother nature..a great man has just passed..it is now time for other men to be great..it is time for us to be great..

         IN MEMORY OF STEVE IRWIN, THE CROCODILE HUNTER.

                                    MAY HE REST IN PEACE

      The week that just past was actualy far less agonizing compared to the past week. For one, Accounting not required, but although we were not required to sit-in in other classes due to the absence of our proffesor(up to next week) us being responsible(ehem ehem) students nontheless chose to attend at least two this week. Also less work in almost all the classes, No eco class, Comm clases were generaly easy, math was uhmm..no math actualy..oh and for sociology..film showing in an air-conditioned class..as our professor said..we have a bit of luxuries..last samurai and the village for us up to next week.

      Finaly, after months of scorching heat and burning sunshine the rain and wind are back. It is so refreshing to feel the cool, soothing breeze of the wind. The cleansing droplets of water from the rain(but i wished there where less rain). It's an ultimate pleasure to sleep while its cold outside and your warm and toast under your blanket. The mix of the two elements is just magical. As a kid and even now this physical feeling is one of my favorites. Reminds me and makes me miss my mounteneering expades..hehe..

   I watched a show that interviewed a basketball player. He was asked what makes his day. His answer was actualy very simple but inspiring "the sunrise, the sunset and peoples smile". What a modest answer. Enjoying the simplest things, sheding a smile on things we take for granted.

   La lang..something i wrote for Sociology and Anthropology..haha..

Joseph Gideon V. Sarreal                                                                     July 3,2006

Ms. Czarina Saloma-Akpedonu                                                            S.A. 21

Of Those Around Me

            As time passes by and we grow in years often we find ourselves reflecting, looking back, looking forward and asking. Reflecting on our lives, the people and events, looking back on every happy, sad and significant moment, looking forward to our futures and asking how, who, what and why. There comes a point as we journey that we start to question how we have become who we are, Who were the people who influenced us, What where the things and events that shaped us, and why are we who we are today. After due reflection we then further ask, are we happy, are we contented, what do we regret, what to change and how to change it. Every question we ask and every thing we imagined is vital in our understanding of ourselves, our development and our quest to become better individuals for the society.

            On the evening of the 15^th I was born. The third child of the soon to be six children of Marisa and Bambi Sarreal. Logically this is where I should start reflecting and seeking factors that led to my being but I believe that even before the day I first opened my eyes to the world people and events where already shaping what I could become and who I could be. Inside my mother womb I was at her mercy and at the mercy of those who surrounded her. What she ate, how she protected herself, how my dad took care of my mom and many other things and people helped in molding me. Imagine if my mom was not careful and conscious about her health, then it would be probable that I be born with an abnormality and in consequence I would have not lived the same today.

            My early childhood, like most, was a life decided and dictated by others. During those early stages my young and innocent mind was easily manipulated and was still unaware of the numerous decisions and options life had to offer. Saying “no” to things adults offered was not likely. It was almost a case of daddy and mommy say, child does or boy see, boy do. Of course my first and most trusted people where my parents. My first and greatest mentors. It was them who molded my mind, taught my values and principles, instilled in my mind what to and not what to do. My dad and mom where near opposites and I believe complemented each other. They were opposites attracted, the perfect team. In one hand there was my dad, stern, ever the disciplinarian and authoritarian. He was the supreme power in the house and had the final say in everything. He almost never admitted fault and was always right. I will never forget the beatings I sustained from my dad. During the later years of my childhood and even during adolescence I was in a way like my dad never admitting fault and I often answered back, something my dad never tolerated. The wounds, the blood and the tears I will always remember with both a frown and a smile. As I look back I recall I was always angry and always cursed but now I see what all the beatings where for. My dad was always silent about his emotions and almost always expressed himself through actions. He never told us “I love You” “good luck” or even “congratulations” rather he would surprise us with gifts, trips and part of it lessons only us would understand. I now my dad loves mo although he never says it something my dad always emphasizes and makes us realize. My mom in the other hand was the more gentle and dramatic type. Always telling us how she felt, expressing her love through both words and actions. She was very smart and intelligent. I admire her and will always love her for her very strong faith, patience and understanding. I am sure if any other woman was married to my dad she would not survive. I had the best mom in the world. I entered school after a while and teachers were immediately impressed with me. They would describe me as a smart, active and talented boy. At a young age we were also presented with a lot of activities. Sports, music, community service and mountain climbing to name a few. An interest in music was established every evening when we where about to sleep during which we were lulled to sleep by the sweet sound of classical music. Eventually a deep appreciation came about and an inclination in music resulted. But the start of more “serious” music and the playing of various musical instruments started through a cartoon show entitled “Cedi”. My 2^nd brother was inspired by Cedi playing the flute and ask my parents if he could play too, my parents ever supportive said yes, eventually all other siblings followed. For the record us 6 sibling play different musical instruments, perform together and have played in various events. People always credit our music to the love we share in the family, I couldn’t agree more. Inclination in sports and mountaineering is attributed to my dad. Ever the fighter and “macho” dad. It was his presence and my mother’s money and prayers that lead to numerous victories in tae kwon do, track and field, basketball, gymnastics and marathon running. Sports kept me in shape, made me proud but more than that developed my self discipline, confidence and will. My mountaineering, adventure-filled and misadventure-filled life is another story. Sights, sounds and people I will always remember. In every climb I was with my 3 other brothers and my dad, we were together from the watching of the sunset up to the near-death experiences we had in Mt. Mayon and Halcon. These events made me tough, trained me to live with the most basic of things, love and cherish my brothers. During these times my brothers were my closest friends, though again we were not vocal about many things the fun and happiness we shared is priceless. After sometime we eventually climbed with my sisters again they were and will always be a special people to me. My mom and dad were also the charity people. They valued sharing and camaraderie. They mad e it a rule that in every performance we had half of what we earned went to a charity or an activity that helped the needy. In response us siblings gave more, and often played for free to those who had less like the orphans and abandoned people. It has always amazed how, even with our most meager earnings and way of life my family sees to prioritize those who have even less.

            Education was an utmost priority for us too. My mom always tells us that our education is their greatest inheritance they could give us. Grade school was a breeze for me. More like a game. I was constantly in the top of my class and graduated with the Dean’s Award. High School was the more special and probably is the most special era of my life. During these times I met the most reliable, special and trusted friends I believe I will ever have. It was with them that I shared almost everything. Laughs, cries, jokes, heartaches. The retreats, the plays, the outings, the games things I will never regret and always reminiscence with a smile. In High School the events that transpired thought me to enjoy the simplest things in life, be hardworking and take life in stride. San Beda instilled the values of fellowship, camaraderie, “pakikisama”, faith and love for others. The teachers, professors, classmates and friends all played a part in developing me.  Now as I study and continue my learning process in The Ateneo I again encounter different people, events and situations. I am presented with new values and principle. New sets of work ethic and a new approach in life. My life in the Ateneo today is defined by my association with the Track and Field team. My first family in Ateneo. The team through it’s athletes and coaches gave me a clear vision on what the Ateneo had in store for me and what was something Atenean. And for me this were being goal-oriented, being the best you can be, pride and a pursuit of excellence. In a way my Bedan and Atenean was a perfect mix, my being Bedan-Atenean was in a way was a perfect combination. Bedan-Atenean for me is being excellent and making others excellent as well, going forward but not leaving anyone behind.

            But my life though full of colorful and wonderful stories is not without it’s regrets. People ask me if I am happy with my life, I say yes but I am not yet satisfied. There are things I wish I did and did not do. Sometimes what I see in others I wish I had. For example is the emotional showing of other families, something I envy a lot. I wish I could express not only happiness and anger but sadness and pain as well. I wish my family was more vocal and expressive. Enduring the beatings of my dad I promised myself never to do it to my future children. When I see people happily enjoying their breaks and vacation I envy them. I hunger less of the material but more on the emotional something that needs a lot of development.But most of these things I cannot change for now but maybe in the near future with my own family things I wished I had and did I could do.

            My life today is influenced by many things and most especially by people, by society. The norms, the traditions and the practices will always have an impact on an individual. Change will always catch up, tradition will always have a say in decisions, these things are inevitable but how we handle this things and how we choose to inject this things into our life is our responsibly. We are people, individuals with our own biases, ideals and most especially freedom to choose. Our life will ultimately depend on us.

This will be quick...WHAT A WEEK..A DEMANDING WEEK ACADEMICALLY..Curse you accounting, damn you math..and all other subjects..thanks for welcoming me from Neuva with loads of work and additional pain in my ass...thanks for ruining my 20 day break..GOD help me...

                  Phew..finally after more than a week of absence I'm here once again to tell my story. It's now just about 5 in the afternoon and I just got up from a very refreshing and reviving siesta. Something I quite deserve and had been longing to do for the past week. And oh what a week it was. One of the most memorable I will ever have. A very hectic, tiring, hassle full(is there such a word), draining but also a very special, fun, dramatic, happy(?)week. A week with its ups and downs, laughs and tears, failures and successes, victories and defeats. I experienced a thrill, a happiness I had not felt for quite sometime.

 I shared this wonderful week experience with the Ateneo Track and Field Nationals Contingent. A group of extraordinary people, dedicated and passionate about not only the sport but their lives and others as well. A team built on hard-work, sacrifice and dedication. So dedicated and hard-working this team was that that opted to sacrifice their summer vacation and train almost six times a week for 3 hours most of the time under the heat of the sun. A team that dwells in pain,  willing to endure physical, mental and spiritual hardships to achieve a goal. We faced set-backs, we faced adversaries, we went through the storm. Together we slew them all. we journeyed together, we stuck together, we were a family bound by common goals and aspirations, goals not so personal but a common goal for each other. We were made champions, not a champion who has a trophy or a medal but champions of a cause and champions of something bigger than ourselves.

On June 20 the 10 male, 1 female athletes and 3 coaches of the national's contingent left Ateneo. The effects of our training of almost 4 weeks was about  to be tested. I knew everyone was anxious, exited and nervous. I having been an athlete for so long that was calmer, I had though of ways to divert my attention to other things first before finally focusing on the task at hand when it draws nearer. The juniors team, the lone female and 2 senior players were together in a van, slightly childish we began joking around and teasing each other. I guess it was a way for us to calm down, have fun a bit and also to ease the tension, but more than that it was a way of bonding even more, exercising the close friendships we had, and just showing how much fun and enjoyment we had together. We travelled for almost 4 hours, for most of the time I listened to music and chatted with daddy John(father of 2) who was my lone seat mate. We were exchanging stories and laughing about our high school lives. And it felt high school realy..the jokes, the stories, everything. We were having such a goodtime chatting that the other people were teasing us on how talkative we were and were saying that we should not be roommates..hehe..we arrived at the track oval..not bad..a quick walk around it and off to dinner..haha..jabi kami..after we headed to the hotel..a good 30 min from the oval..but gosh what a lavish hotel..yipee..swimming pool, slides, aircon our was a two story room..hehe..that night I knew we had a meeting, we knew what to do, we were motivated, we were raring to fight, to show our skills. I was thinking on how I would run, I was doubtful, but I had to focus. One of my teamates was scared but I just told him to focus on how he will run the race properly and not to think about the mistakes he could make. It should be like that, in everything, you have something achievable, why think it is not. Being pessimistic is always a no-no for me. I opt to find an opportunity in everything whether it be a victor or defeat. That night I prayed, to keep me away from injury, to make me run my race..for him. I then dreamed..still of running..

The next day we were greeted by rain, we proceeded to the oval and arrived at around 6:30 AM.I was starting to get nervous, I was thinking about other competitors, a no-no in track. In track you have your lane, you strategize, you run in your lane,  your greatest opponent is yourself. I was to run the 800 meter run, 2 laps in the oval..My run ran in late 9:30 was my sked but we started at 12. there was a total of 6 heats for the 800 meter run boys, with 8 runners in each heat..i ran on the sixth heat and on the 8^th lane. I watched others and saw how strong they were, but that was not my race, a had to mine to run. Then it was my turn..8^th lane, everyone positioned behind me.. "PUESTO" then a loud "BANG". I started running, for the first 200 meters I saw to my left people passing by. I had to catch up..i'm in the outermost lane..i should not be passed..after 100 meters it was time to cut to lane 1..i saw 2 people ahead of me..and then my first error..i got exited and chose to take the lead and pace the pach..for the first 400 meters I was feeling confident, I was relaxed, I was not breathing heavy yet, I even smiled on the second curve..for the first 500 meters I was at the lead..then came another error..i saw another runner wanting to overtake.i decided to let him and catch up later it was going ok..but then I commited the biggest mistake of the race..i chose to try to regain the lead in the curve..a definite no-no..i was about to speed up my run when suddenly he decided to speed up to. The result..i had to run a longer race and he got a way..i gave way and never caught up again..i was second..but I was not satisfied..

After the race I sat down, pondered..at first I was so angry and frustrated..not only at myself but to the person who came first. A little mistake could jeopardize everything, a miscalculation could prove disastrous..a minor lapse in judgement and you could loose everything..something true both in a race and in life. In my seat I was so pissed of, I had one chance and I blew it. This was track and field, this was life..you train for months, you sacrifice so much, you sweat, you toil, you shed tears and you bleed, then you are givern one chance "ONE-TIME,BIG-TIME" as they say. For sprinters you sprint almost two hours a day everyday, carry very heavy weights and then in a matter of seconds it's all over..you loose..you cry..you win thank GOD, for me..i run almost 3-5 kilometers a day, run a very fast 6oo meters thrice, feel my body suddenly become cold, my muscles stiffen and then get soar and I was given a chance and in a little more than 2 minutes..it was over..I lost..to the winner thank GOD..i was blank for a moment, at a shock, I did not know what to do..but thanks to my teamates I calmed down and suddenly remembered my principle and values..i saw light, I saw a good enough run, I saw room for improvement..i saw a lesson learned..

For the succeeding hours and days the team both saw the summit and lost it, both had gold and had nothing. Mike and Bryan each one medals, the 4x100 mens team failed to finish, to boys relay team entered the finals then faltered, Daddy John and Ian improved their times, Jots had a very good run, we sucked at the 4x400 Meter realay, but I ran a good 400, Joboy tied the UAAP record, Vitto had a exellent final 100 meters, Mariel, after almost running 5-10km a day failed to run. Not exactly uouy fairy tale ending eh..but this is reality..you win some you loose some. Defeats make victories, losses make successes, loosers make winners..but ultimately it does not matters, the essence of sports is not really winning nor was it achieving glory rather it's coming out of the games weather a winner or a looser a better man, a better person, believing your living a better life. Medals are great, trophies even greater but what is greater than being a champion of you life, living knowing that you are a fighter, that you are your best. I am proud of my team..they fall, they stand up, they loose, they dream of vicrory, no whining for us, no complaining, just another opportunity..In defeats there should bo no reasons..only solutions..

Hey..congrats to San Beda College Seniors Basketball team..

To all my friends..i miss you guys..see you soon..

 What a day..haha..we'll actually what a day it should have been but as before it was not..nothing special, nothing magical..hell it was even tiring and stressfull. BUt still..thanks for all those who greeted me on my birthday today. thanks to Mom, Dad my brothers and sisters,andopted brother F.A., Marcus, Boboy, Dan, Patrick, JL, Erol, Carlo B.,Abdul,  Lolo, Emily..thanks for the cake whoever sent it..phew..ang konti..haha..i was expecting others especially to those who I consider very close and dear to me..well I'll just assume they were too busy to remember..or they don't have load.. but to those people who remembered..God thanks a lot, a lot and a lot more.it really made me feel good..your greeting made my day…To be honest I was quite lonely..first my dad asked me to run an errand that took me half the day after which as soon as I got home I had to clean up and rush to Ateneo for the team meeting..and all the while I was alone..alone going to cavite, alone at home, alone going to school and even though I was with more than 20 teamates during the meeting I still felt alone and cold. no one knew..boo-hoo..well I was expecting it anyways..the event is  nothing big to fuss about in the first place..

Well..another disappointment..it is times like these that you start thinking about your life and life itself..(yeah its sounds corny to be so dramatic just because of my birthday but for me no..admit it or not you expect something big when your day comes and not getting it will piss you off.) you think of the people, of the things you've done and the things you want to do. You ask yourself if you've just made a major mistake in life or if the way you live  worthy of living? I had those questions in my mind..pondering on what went wrong or who went wrong..in a supposedly special day why do I feel so unspecial, so void, so alone and so missing? For the whole day I could not focus..i believed silence was my only companion…thankfully I had a lot of these disappointing times to teach me how to deal with them. I have learned to just forget it, let go and move on. No amount of bickering, or sobbing or cursing will change anything. What I believe I have done is expect less, anticipate even less and maybe just hope for something.

Well the day was not really a complete mess. On my way home from cavite I was riding a bus when it started to drizzle. It felt so refreshing to feel the cold wind and seeing the green fields while cruising along the provincial road. For a while I felt at peace, my day did not start right and it seemed it wouldn't but I believe that moment eased my burden a bit. A short moment of bliss is priceless in a sea of troubles.

Again..thanks to everyone who greeted me..you're some of the best…good luck and God bless..

   First thought: Damn i have such useless and sensless titles..haha

I’m writing this entry with a bit of water in my ears, my arms and back red and painful due to sun burn and drowsy eyes..I just came from the company outing of my dad’s client. Actually it was my dad who paid everything. The food, the accommodations, transportation etch.. It was held in a pool resort in the Dasmariñas, Cavite Area. The place was not as lavish as Fontana and Splash Island but it was good enough for me to supposedly be able to relax and engage it a “water therapy session”. The place had 2 children’s pool, 2 large pools for the older or rather bigger people and another large pool in which the artificial waves were situated. The place was made more exiting and lively because of the Variety song music(yuck) and the slides(whee). But the slides were the things that gave me the ultimate fun and pleasure. Haha..there were almost 10 slides but I only used for of them and 2 of them I used the most. First was the yellow slide which led to the children’s pool the other a high red slide which led to the older pips pool. Both were steeper than the other which provided speed..raw speed..haha..going fast is always a thrill..so fast, so steep and so curved the curves were that if you go too fast there is a chance you go airborn and get a bunt once in a while(for 43and 34 pips, its like what happens in the JOgima slide). It was dangerous actually, someone met an accident, she hit a corner and bled..tsk tsk..anyway another attraction were the artificial wave..hehe..15 minutes of riding the high wave and sometimes trying to drown my friend..oh..i had friends there..PJ, his 6 year old brother Jadeson and his dad..of course my dad was there too..Anyway..my supposedly relaxing water therapy session was but a dream..instead I had hardcore sliding, riding the waves and swimming and eating of course..phew..al that was tiring(even the eating) but fun never the less..Anyway..for me this is a last ditch effort to enjoy a hectic and hassle full summer…haha..swimming for the last time..and having fun for the whole day..only the second time this summer..yes only the second(the other with 43 pips in cavite) it’s always..i go somewhere after training, or after classes, or after doing a chore..its so sad ain’t it..hehe..

what else is new??.oh my passion for my trumpet is back..yes..in practicing in a more regular basis now..like everyday(or trying)hehe..well you cant forget what you love as they say..i love my trumpet and my music..it makes me feel special, makes me feel different..it’s an outlet..of hate, of anger, of passion, of happiness, of love..I love my trumpet..Love music..

What else…haha..just a thought..when I got home we talked about how my dad planned that company outing and we were in agreement that my dad spent too much. And my mom went like this.. “You know how everyone of us has an abnormal side and has an abnormal tendency..well that’s your dad’s abnormality..Once he get’s on going with things like an outing or a party he gets over passionate, spending so much, doing things that are unnecessary, he suddenly does things he would not allow us to do if we planned it” and all agreed..funny though. I was thinking whether that abnormality was negative or positive..i assumed it was both..and I was thinking of my abnormality??was it good or bad..and whats yours??

Good luck and happy firstday of school tomorrow for those college students starting skul tomorrow..wish you the best..haha

Oh wait..i need a vote hear..remember my last post..i told you guys that one reason I read blogs is because I get a laugh out of reading grammatical errors..well I was planning on making a sort of list.just posting one or two grammatical errors..do you think I should do it??pls..reply..hehe..thanks

            Gud nyt for know..bye..God Bless to everyone